Shift Addiction

Shift Addiction



This is an incredibly loaded topic and can provoke very strong emotions.

Especially after a difficult year(s) for so many of us, offering public opinions or suggestions on this topic can be fraught.

But it’s worthwhile, I believe.

Please know that I don’t intend to represent any idea as categorically accurate for every individual, situation, ‘addiction’ or moment.

In fact, some of what I’ve shared below is clearly not of primary relevance for everyone, or for every situation.

My words come from love.

We are here to lift each other up while we shift our state of mind anytime.

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Take a long deep breath.

I get asked about addiction sometimes.

For advice about how to help someone else, or how to help yourself.

I can't say it's been a specialty of mine in practice.

But I do know one very powerful and frequent shift out of addiction.

A lot of times people tell themselves they want to stop.

And they try to stop.

But it doesn't work.

There’s no magic bullet.

But when you get this insight deeply into your mind and body — it's the one to me that's the most powerful.

And that is…

A recognition that you want to love fully.

You come to the conclusion that you can't love fully as long as you have this addiction that is consuming your attention — and your body, your presence.

You can only give so much to someone else — and or, to life, or to yourself — if your attention is possessed by addiction.

So choosing love is very powerful.

Loving is embracing life in the present moment, which can transcend fear, and pain, and unwanted habits.

But still, addiction can be very tough to overcome.

A lot of times it's not overcome.

And often then, there's a not so good ending.

If you're struggling with it, reach out for help.

That's another important turning point — telling someone.

“Hey, this is going on with me. And I want to change it.”

Alright, let's take a long deep breath.

Come fully into presence — fully into this moment together.

All your attention right here.

Fill our hearts up with love.

Love for life.

Love for the journey.

(Deep breath)

Feel love coming into your heart.

Relax your whole body.

Relax your shoulders.

Relax your arms.

(Deep breath.)

Just drop in.

Let's sit in silence for a minute or so.


Listen to life.

Sometimes we need to go all the way to the edge, and look over, and then say —

‘Okay, I see. I'm gonna go back. I'm not done yet.'

And that's another moment — a moment when we can change directions, 180 degrees sometimes.

Any degree of a turn, and a shift, can be a positive though.

I wish you the best on your journey — and presence for the rest of today.

I'll talk to you soon.


P.S. — You can call (800) 662-4357 for confidential support anytime.

P.P.S. — After I completed recording this post I found myself thinking a lot about the range of what each of us might think qualifies as an addiction — and the myriad ways we come to engage with, or perhaps even feel we are being intentional about addiction.

By definition of being human we each live a unique life. And, painful turns are as fundamental to our lives as learning and growing and triumphing.

On any given day, life is harder for some of us than it is for others. And, each of our circumstances can change at any moment.

Hold judgement softly.

Listen hard.

Share silence.

Listening together is healing for everyone.


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OnePerfect Shift is an audio letter from a psychologist that shifts you into a better state of mind anytime. Each post gives you a fresh look at your relationship to your mind and reminds you how much control you can have over your life experience.